forever alone.

I know I'm surrounded by awesome people in my life -- a loving family and a few awesome friends -- but I just couldn't help feeling completely alone sometimes.

it's quite late in my life for all this 'aww, no one truly understands me' crap that most teenagers go through, but there are just some days when I really, seriously feel that way. and no, it's not about being single -- I'm with my friends most of the time, so it's really not about companionship. plain and simple, it's about just being understood.

somehow, having someone agree to what you're saying or sympathize with what you're feeling just doesn't feel the same as being understood, like, for real. I'm not sure what the difference is, though, but I do know that having people agree to what you say just doesn't cut it. then again, maybe it's just me asking too much of other people and getting way too attached that I feel like I need them to understand and share what I'm feeling to avoid feeling alone and helpless.

and I'm not really making sense here. I guess I'm not strong enough or independent enough to stand alone when crap starts flying towards me. that's something I need to work on because, even if we opt not to admit it or say it out loud, sometimes, all you really have in this world is yourself.


I'm just missing my friends too much.